Ordinary stress is pressure exerted on us in our normal daily life. My car breaks down, my boss misunderstands me, I lose some money in my investment, I have an argument with my friend, I am going to sit an important examination tomorrow, and so on; these are normal events that we may have everyday. I am jealous, I am disappointed, I regret I am frustrated, I feel guilty, I am frightened, and so on; these are feelings and reactions we can have in our everyday lives.
When we are under stress, a normal reacting mechanism in our body works to counteract the stress applied to us. Our body feels threatened, and we put ourselves on battle alert. We respond in two ways: with a biological reaction and with a psychological reaction. These two ways go hand in hand with each other, and both are protective mechanisms against the threat of imminent danger.
Biological reaction
Our body is immediately geared up for the stress, ready for ‘fight or flight’. Plenty of adrenaline is circulating, and our muscles are all tensed, our heart pumping hard, our blood pressure high so that our body is ready for the flight, our blood thickened and able to clot easily just in case we are injured or bleed in the fight, and our eyes wide open with the pupils dilated and staring at every move of the enemy. There is little chance of falling asleep when there is imminent danger as we are on guard all the time.
The biological reaction to stress developed way back in the course of evolution, but is still very important in present day life; for example, in a boxing competition or when soldiers are fighting in combat. Or when attacked by a burglar, we have to either ‘fight’ or ‘flight’, although I personally prefer flight.
However, in most modern stress situations the biological reaction becomes a burden. Physical action is normally not required. If your boss misunderstands you, you become very uptight and are ready to explode. But in most cases, even if you want to, you are not going to give him a black eye, as this is a civilized world. This biological reaction generates a lot of energy, which we are unable to release. We feel distressed. Continual, chronic, modern stress can be harmful to the body. We are flooded with excess adrenaline, and we have a greater chance of falling victim to a heart attack or stroke. This is because, during the biological reaction to stress, the blood pressure is high to increase the energy supply through circulation, and the blood will clot easily to stop bleeding if this is necessary. Some authorities recommend an aspirin a day to thin the blood, so as to prevent heart attack or stroke, as both can result from a clot in a vital blood vessel; in the case of a heart attack, it is a clot in the coronary artery supplying the heart muscle, and, in the case of a stroke, it is a clot in an important artery supplying the brain.
One of the things that makes us human is that we possess a unique psychological reaction to stress. We automatically protect our psyche; we deny what is going to happen. Denial of the existence of the stress is a normal common defence mechanism. A sense of disbelief is not uncommon. We feel anxious and sad at the same time. We are no longer sleepy, our brain is on full alert, unable to switch off, and is ready for the challenge. In fact we are wide awake. We magnify and exaggerate the stress, so that the stress in question occupies every part of our mind. It is as if we are carrying a magnifying glass and examining the issue in detail all the time. So it is psychologically normal to exaggerate and to blow things out of all proportion when we are under stress. We will not let go until the issue is resolved.
The psychological reaction is useful as long as we do not suffer from it, but repeated exposure to stress can result in psychological illness, such as chronic insomnia, anxiety, panic attacks, agoraphobia, and even alcoholism. Were we all like coconuts, ordinary stress would have no effect on us. However, there are very few coconuts around. Psychologists have noticed that there are certain kinds of personalities that react excessively to stress. These are the perfectionists, who expect the real world to be perfect and strive for 100 per cent all of the time. If they feel that anything is not up to their expectation, they feel very stressed.
Albert Ellis, a famous psychologist in New York, has developed a new concept in psychology called the rational emotive therapy, in which all psychological problems are a result of our irrational thinking. He states that some of us believe: ‘I must be loved and approved by every person in my life, I must achieve at all times, and it is the end of the world if things are not how I expect them to be’. In other words, some of us have a very low threshold of tolerance, and our thinking is irrational and childish. If the boss misunderstands such a person, he will say: ‘This is horrible, as I must be loved and approved by every person in my life’. He will turn the incident into a catastrophe and feel stressed.
Hence, even with everyday ordinary stress which is normal and natural in our real world, some people feel very stressed. In other words, they are like tomatoes in the bag. A patient once came to see me with a fractured knuckle of his right hand. He told me he was driving from Canberra to Melbourne, and his car broke down. He felt so mad at the car that he punched the bonnet violently. The rest you know. He regretted what he did, as the bonnet now had an additional dent in it.
Let us examine what happened here. The car breaking down was a source of stress, as he did not expect it to. His psychological reaction was to exaggerate it out of all proportion, and say to himself: ‘It is the end of the world, as things are not how I expected them to be’. The biological reaction was switched on at the same time, and he was ready to fight. The enemy here was the car. The result was that it got punched, and he got the injured hand. An ordinary everyday incident can be turned into a catastrophic one if we do not direct the reactions to the stress in the appropriate direction in order to aid its resolution.
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